Sarah Selim
Posted on January 5th, 2007 by info
“Sacrifice, to be real, must cost, must hurt, must empty us of ourselves.” Mother Teresa
We were all feeling tired and sick and I was feeling beyond humbled by my share of coughs and sneezes and overall inability to breath. Did I mention I’m allergic to dust? We all have engaged in our fair share of pity parties, but I know that no matter how tough I think I am or anyone imagines they are, every breath is by the grace of God… in this country, literally every breath. After a totally sleepless night I was tense about not being able to find my toothbrush; it was the straw that broke the camel’s back, but it’s funny sometimes how the Lord sends the clearest messages. On our way back from morning mass at the Missionaries of Charity Mother House, I saw a homeless man laying on the corner and when I looked closer he was holding none other than… you guess it - a toothbrush. Need I say more. The Lord really does move in mysterious ways… and yes I found my toothbrush later - don’t worry.
By 2:15pm I left for Daya Dan because despite the fatigue, I couldn’t imagine missing out on those gorgeous kids for even a day and lucky for me the first thing there to greet me was Arundjoti’s poop… and I mean all over. Yummy, I know. I can’t say that I don’t find it difficult, I still cringe everytime I see poop on my hands or on the face of a child, but I appreciate it so much because in our own small way, God has given us the chance to hurt and to sacrifice and be in communion with the poor and suffering.
Probably my favorite part of serving in the homes is sitting by the beds of the children. Kneeling by Angeli’s bed, a frail and crying 7 yr old who’s just gorgeous. She doesn’t look over 3 yrs old. I took her hand and kissed her forehead and wispered, ‘you know it won’t always be this way and one day we’ll see each other in heaven,’ but the Lord knows that so much of the time we spending comforting the children who are suffering by praying and singing to them is really spent comforting ourselves. I love Piya so much… I can’t hid it. Like Anjeli she only makes sounds and has cerebrial palsy and will never walk. She is a 4 yr old in the body of a 6th month old baby. But Piya has a killer smile and beautiful eyes that made it hard to rip myself away at 5:30 pm. After putting them in bed I can sit for hours and stroke their faces and sing to them. Sometimes even for the just a moment, they look deep into your eyes and it’s all the fuel you need. The first night I had to get up twice, walk away, cry, and then come back to their beds.
On the walls in Daya Dan it says, ”Beauty is perfected in deformity.” When I first came on this trip I would turn my face from a child with no eye balls because my heart ached too much to look at them, but the Lord has really blessed me with the ability to hold a severely disabled child and look at them with love and confidence in His perfect plan. Wjhile I still look at their frail hands in my strong hands and wonder why I can’t give them my body instead, any heartache for them is replaced by knowing that God has a special place in His kingdom for them. I know they are in the palm of His hands. Every day with them has truly been a privilege from God. The Lord has really allowed us to partake in his glory and just between you and I… I can’t wait to come back - God willing.
Keep us in your prayers and shout out to my high school girls!
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Sarah, thank you for sharing your experiences. You really brought tears to my eyes. I hope that one day God will touch each of our hearts and teach us those same lessons that He taught you!